The Companion Effect #3 - Invest in Your Resilience Buddy System and Thrive

As-salamu alaykum,

An Unforgettable Trip

It was 2.30am when multiple alarms went off in our quad hotel room. After a couple of snoozes on our end from the fatigue of travel leading up to this moment, we all slowly but intentionally got up acknowledging the tranquility of the hour and the barakah (blessings) of the city that our companionship had led us to. 

All 4 of us, now in vastly different seasons of life relative to 10 years ago, had committed to a trip to the City of Madinah. The surgical resident, now a Urologist; the Process Engineer, now a Management Consultant; the seasoned Hospitalist, now turned Pulmonologist and Critical Care physician and yours truly, now pivoted to the hybrid world of Telemedicine and Hospital Medicine; all of us now fathers and family men, Alhamdulillah.

We embraced the serene atmosphere as we proceeded to the Prophet’s mosque and, as our designated Amir (leader) for the trip always did, he spotted a prime location for us to “camp out” for the rest of the morning up until the Fajr Salah (the dawn prayer) came in. We juggled Tahajjud, recitation of the Qur’an and silent supplication to our creator in these special moments as we awaited the dawn prayer and a world class rendition of the Qur’an by one of the famous Imams of the Prophet’s mosque.

In these precious moments, we were reminded of the essence of our companionship - a resilient bond founded upon an intentional connection with the Qur’an that has shaped our journey to this space and time in the beautiful city of the Prophet.

In the ensuing days, we had many opportunities to reflect on our collective journey and why we all felt strongly about holding on tight to this blessing of the companion effect. The following are a few thoughts that came up in those moments of pause.  

Prophetic Wisdom - A Contagious Ambience of Goodness

Among the many benefits of being around good people is the ambience of goodness that surrounds them. Believe me, this benefit is readily accessible to each and every one of us if we choose to approach them with intention - remember how I stumbled upon my 2 friends to begin with?

Prophet Muhammad PBUH teaches us this essential lesson in the following hadith narrated by Abu Musa where the Prophet said, "The example of a good companion (who sits with you) in comparison with a bad one, is like that of the musk seller and the blacksmith's bellows (or furnace); from the first you would either buy musk or enjoy its good smell while the bellows would either burn your clothes or your house, or you get a bad nasty smell thereof." [Sahih Al Bukhari 2101]

If you want to smell of goodness, then find you some good resilient buddies and hang on to them!

PRO-TIPs to Keep it Going

If you are looking to thrive and to stay resilient in the business of life and in particular, a space as challenging as healthcare, you really want to invest in and cultivate your resilience buddy system. Here are 4 tips to do that with intentionality.

1. Connect Often  

True companionship requires a meaningful investment from you and me.

Prophet Muhammad PBUH set a high bar that we can aspire to in his unprecedented challenge to the Ansar (residents of Madinah) to accommodate the Muhajireen (migrants from Makkah) with all their heart and resources when he made the Hijrah (migration) to the blessed city of Madinah.  

Staying in touch is foundational but the exponential tailwinds of the companion effect comes from going deep and being vulnerable with one another. This is where true growth, barakah and the resilience outcomes start to become unlocked.   

2. Create Shared Experiences

Alhamdulillah, my resilience buddies and I have accrued a number of shared experiences over the years from the simple like playing basketball together all the way to a logistic heavy one like the Umrah trip that I shared earlier. Take 1 step at a time to nurture these and strengthen these bonds.

3. Commit to Each Other’s Successes 

Be supportive and challenge each other to continue to grow and to cultivate resilient habits and routines that will drive your successes in this life and the hereafter. The success of one is truly the success of the collective.

4. Commune with Allah for One Another

Pray for your buddies as you pray for yourself. This takes the bonds out of the realm of this world to a whole different level. Remember the words of Prophet Muhammad PBUH about the prayer for the one who is absent  - "No supplication is more readily responded to” 

The company we keep is crucial to our success in this life and the hereafter. The more we cultivate them with intention guided by the divine and prophetic wisdoms, the better our overall outlook with respect to our integrated work-lives in the service of humanity and in leveraging this very service to earn Allah, the Most High’s pleasure and attaining true success in the hereafter.

Let none of us go it alone any longer. The odds are stacked too far against the lone sheep.

May Allah, the Most High, keep us with the best of company that supports our growth, resilience and success in this life and the hereafter. Amin 

Sincerely,

Sulyman

P.S. I'm on a mission to help 15 Muslim healthcare professionals have a balanced and burnout-proof 2025. If you are keen to learn how to stay resilient in the new year then take a minute to share your interest here.  This program offers time-tested pragmatic lessons with first-rate support that helps you navigate the struggles of healthcare work with resilience in sha Allah.

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